It's funny and sad when you realize how much you take for granted a simple
Act of going to church. Tonight after work and dinner I decided to take a walk around Reykjavik's streets.
Most of the shops were closed, but the night life was just starting. I came around the corner of yet another adorable little street, and there it was: glorious, so tall, even from a few blocks away - a house of God.
It looked like a spaceship,pointing towards the heavens. Among the small, old town buildings it stood proud and glorious. I started walking towards it, my heart beating faster, the closer I came. I could see the stained glass above the massive front doors. I don't know what it is about catholic churches that sends my heart trembling. Suddenly, I was all to aware of me messy uncovered hair, me jeans, my dirty sweater.
I wondered if they would let me in wearing jeans, but I had to try. Suddenly I wanted nothing more than to walk into a quiet cool darkness, smell the candles, kneel beside the altar( or more exactly, some dark corner) and ask Him for miracle. For Kiril and the Hook family. For me and guidance. For nothing in particular, just to be in his house, on me knees.
The church was closed for the day, open only during the business hours during the week - sadly the times that I would not be able to com. Disappointed, I sat outside, on one of the benches. No one around, the gray sheet of clouds above. The quietest part of the city at night. And then I realized that He sat there with me. Right on that bench, under the cold drizzle, the gray sky and quiet of the late Monday afternoon. We sat together, me- with disjointed prayers running through my head, and Him, just listening patiently.
How could You be here,with me always? Undeserving, unfaithful, a stubborn faithless child. And yet You walked out of Your temple, sat with me, walked with me back to the hotel, and even now I feel my body tremble and my soul
For You are with me.
I think that's the only God's temple here,although I cannot be sure. I think that I won't get to see the inside,but I suppose that it doesn't matter. On my knees, before you,Abba. Even when I'm walking or sitting at work.