Last week I was struck with a realization that I am living a life that I am not meant to live. Instead of a full-time career woman what I really want to do is stay at home and raise our son (or children, should that happen).
Last week, with trembling heart, I have brought my feelings before my husband. He said he would be happy to back me up, but our finances at this time are stacked against us.
At first I wanted to cry in disappointment and frustration, but I felt the gentle Hand on my shoulder, and a whisper to wait, pray and trust. Not a few minutes after our talk, we have gotten amazing news that will possibly relieve most of our financial trouble and will enable me to stay home. Not only that, it will give me time to work on starting my own business that I have been dreaming of for the past several months, and bring in even more.
Of course it will not happen right away, but the fact that all of a sudden, things that have been so uncomfortable for the past 2 years have started to move - its like a giant piece of ice just broke off from the glacier of our financial troubles, and is now sailing towards the tropical seas, waiting to be melted by the warm waters.
But most of all, its not just how God provides again and again, but how he gives hope. As long as I allow myself to hope and be faithful to trust him. Not now, not right away, but hope for SOMEday.
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